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Halfway out of the dark.. - Somewhat Heartless, and Somewhat Grown [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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Halfway out of the dark.. [Dec. 31st, 2010|07:29 pm]
Spending a quiet New Year's Eve at home by myself for a change. I've never done this, not once since I turned eighteen, so far as I can remember, and it feels almost decadent to do so in a way I can't quite explain. Also, honestly, I had such a good time on my birthday (thank you, everyone!) that going out and partying tonight just seems somehow redundant to me.

Instead, I think I'm starting a new tradition -- since my birthday is a time when I get gifts from other people, and Christmas is a time I focus on giving gifts to other people -- I think New Year's is going to become the time when I give gifts to myself. Namely, things I've been wanting and needing and will make my life better, that I haven't managed to get around to buying until now.

This year, it's a snazzy set of computer speakers -- one of my old speakers died a couple years back, and I've been limping along on the remaining speaker all this time -- and a cordless, illuminated keyboard. See, I don't have a desk -- my computer's in the living room, with my monitor on a laptop stand, and I lounge around on my couch while on-line. And I've developed a bad habit of using it in the dark, and trying to type with just the light from the monitor has been getting increasingly tiresome. I'm curled up with the keyboard in my lap, happy as a clam. (Not that I understand why clams are said to be particularly happy.)

I'll still be joining you all in a champagne toast at midnight, from the comfort of home.


I haven't posted much here in a long time, not anything important, anyway. In 2009, I had things going on in my life I didn't really want to face or reflect on. 2010 was mainly about recovering from that, finding my bearings, and starting to build a new life for myself. And now I've reached the end of this year and I want to look back on it, and I realize I miss having a written record like this one to help with that. So I think I'll be posting a little more from now on.

This New Year's Eve finds me looking forward to the coming year with hope and light and enthusiasm, in a way I haven't felt at New Year's in a long time. I can only wish the same to you and yours, and I'll see you all again when the calendar turns the page.

(Crossposted from http://icebluenothing.dreamwidth.org/160898.html, since I don't really support LiveJournal anymore. Come join us at Dreamwidth! You can comment there using your LJ account or other OpenID provider.)